Comedy Night but it’s a christian server
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Comedy Night but it’s a christian server


Stranger: Going down, down, down, and the flames went higher Kevin: No… No fecking way? Kevin: No…. Kevin: I don’t have anything to say to this.. K: I didn’t set this up this- this is the first room i have joined tonight. K: I got to do the same song, I got to get up on stage.. Stranger: And if you couldn’t tell that song was called “The ring of fire” K: I have never heard that before I really liked it! K: Good job! K: Okay um… K: I just- I want to hear the host as well, it- it says you’re a rapist can you do some rap? K: Uhh after me or something? Stranger: You can he- You can do some rap but like- K: No I’m asking you. K: You’re the one the self-proclaimed rapist. S: Ooh no, no, no, no, no, no, no that says “Rapist” K: Oh hohho my mis- (SHIT) What a funny misunderstanding! K: Alright uh-let’s continue… S: Ahh yeah, yeah, yeah I don’t make songs
K: Yeah my mistake man. K: Okay, moving swiftly onwards. K: Okay, I’m gonna do a song. You may not have heard it before, It’s called “Ring of fire” S: WAAIT A MINUTE… K: Get ready folks! S: You’re just trying to one up the last guy..! K: Love, is a burning thing… K: The ring of fire… K: Okay, the next person that wants to sing ring of fire can come up next, thank you. S: And it makes, a fiery ring… K: Okay wrap some Ring a fire for me boy! S: No, you want me to sing Ring of fire? K: Yeah you’re the rapist, c’mon! S: I’m not gonna do Ring of fire…
K: Ring of fire please, thank you. S: I wanna do- I wanna do like uh S: Ring of firee.. K: Ring of fire please. K: I don’t want to flog a dead horse or anything, I don’t want to sing it again it’s sounded really K: Burnt, burn, burn you know? Ha- ha… K: All right we’re gonna play at James Brown “I feel good” K: It burns… K: The ring of fire… K: And it burns… K: It burns… K: The ring of fiiiiiireeeee (Audience cheering) K: Thank you. K: God with a name like that you never think he’d spam the mic through this guys performance… S: Oh my god can we kick this person? K: If you kick him you have to kick everyone, it’s only fair. K: Hello. K: Please. Oh i needed that music for my joke alright it’s fine. (Kevin clearing throat) K: Okay, so why do people eat Special K? S: They’re special… K: Okay uh well it’s because they’re delicious three grain flakes combine whole wheat barley and rice to deliver- S: Bro c’mon… K: To deliver a crunchy and nourishing breakfast enriched with a blend of nine essential- K: Do they not want to be healthy? K: Including Vitamin D, B Vitamin, zink and iron Special K has many of the nutrients you need to help you feel strong- K: I’ve been banned, of course. K: So I’m gonna do a bit of a freestyle here on my instrument so I, if someone could drop a beat for me? K: There y’all, okay here we go. K: Three, two, one… K: You know keep going, keep going you need to keep going! S: It’s tiring… S: Yeah, that’s gonna work
K: Come on man! K: It’ll be worth it K: I-I-I, come on please? S: Can’t you just get some background, music? S: There’s got to be a beat K: I guess… K: Yeah I’ll bring it up on YouTube that’s a good idea actually. K: This is gonna be hard to play K: I’ve got, some Wii music here (Professional flute playing) S: Is it rude of me to kick him off stage?
(Flute playing continues) (Flute playing intensifies) K: HAHHahhah K: Why does no one embrace my musical talent…
Not even my neighbors S: Every night in- (Flute playing continues) … My dreams S: I see you, I feel you
(Flute) S: That is how I know you, go on…
(More amazing flute playing) K: Thank you, thank you. That was with one hand too, ’cause I had to hold space… K: Why do people eat Special K? S: Why?.. K: Because they’re delicious three grain, flakes combined whole wheat barley and rice to deliver a crunchy and nourishing breakfast enriched with a blend of nine essential vitamins and miracles including vitamin D- S: Oh my fucking god.. K: I came to watch the Bee Movie S: I’m just searching up the script…. K: Why do you need to search it, do you not know it by memory? S: No… I hav- Last time I watched K: By all known laws of aviation bees should not be able to fly. S: I weigh 130- Oh shit I didn’t mean to click that. S: Wait 130 what? K: He’s say- He’s talking about pounds. S: Oh, we don’t use those in this- In my- S: I’M SORRY I WEIGH 130 S: METERS, or whatever… K: Yeah, 130 meters is an appropriate measurement of weight. S: Who let fucking Larry David in the back here Jesus… K: Dude now you pay attention to me, to insult me. K: I’ve been talking for ages here and you just ignore me. (Breathing) K: It’s a budget Darth Vader.
I like it. K: I think it’s against adequate to sit right next to me when there are this many free chairs. (COUGH) (More coughing) (Applauding) K: Thank you appreciate it man (The flute is back at it again with the great music) S: Pow, dun dun dun dun… K: Excuse me this is a duet. S: Can you play the Mario theme song? K: Alright boys, buckle up buckaroos (Flute) S: I don’t deserve to be on stage with such talent. K: Thank you S: That was fucking beautiful.
S: Thank you. K: Thank you.
S: That was incredible. (Kevin playing the flute again) God: Welcome brother how you doing? K: Hello I’m catholic, and from Ireland. God: That’s pretty good… K: It has been five months since my last confession. God: You know you can’t confess to a person. God: They themselves, are sinners. God: The only person you could confess your sins to his God himself. K: And I’d like confess that I have been rude to people on the street, stealing a bit of fruit from the store. I was extremely hungry. (Not) God: I’m-I’m not- I’m not God. Take that up with God. K: And..
(Not) God: Uh-huh? K: It was a bit upsetting but it’s all right it’s- it’s something that I highly regret and I’m never gonna do again and also I run some people down on my car from time to time, thank you very much. (Not) God: Okay. That’s it? K: Yeah, that’s about it. K: Dude you got to confess, Mr Annoying. K: You can’t just come in here and sit… (Not) God: No. K: … and not confess. (Not) God: Don’t confess to me. (Not) God: When you think about it we’re all criminals man. K: I told you in confidence that I hit people with my car there’s no need to bring that up. Gay man: I’m a gay person what do I do then? (Not) God: You’re a sinner. (Not) God: Well the bible says no homosexuals would inherit the kingdom of God. K: I just want to hear what the other guy has to say as well tho, I want to hear both sides you know? (Not) God: Yeah go ahead bro. K: Okay, go ahead tell me what is it like to be gay? Gay man: Being gay is- uh Gay man: Honestly dude it’s the best thing ever. K: Oh well sign me up then if it’s the best thing ever i may as well just do. (Not) God: You know if you’re trolling I’m gonna have to kick you brother, I’m gonna… Gay man: Jesus christ is my savior! (Not) God: Let’s start clearing up S: Oh my god! (Not) God: You know? K: I think you converted him!
(Not) God: Big boy stay here. What’s that? K: I think you convinced him he said that Jesus was his savior . (Not) God: I could tell a troll from a serious person I’ve been doing this for a while. K: Ah I see. K: Come down here and let me baptize you! S: Is that allowed? K: You have to be catholic in here. S: Oh. K: I had to prove I was a catholic when I came in. (Not) God: We- we are not trying to make this a comedy, section. K: Yeah why would we make this a comedy room on Comedy Night get off the stage. S: It said the other- (Kevin laughing) K: That was the final straw! K: I truly am an Irish catholic boy it’s just a strange place to have a religious preacher. K: Okay, I came from the Christian chat room, and I’m here to read my favorite chapter. K: Okay, so chapter 7 The Ministry Of Magic.
Harry awoke at half-past five the next morning. Harry nodded again the laws on your side said Luke quietly. He dropped his voice and said if you can get away before seven Molly’s making meatballs. Go on he panted pointing his thumb at the door.
-Get in there! And stepped inside the courtroom. End of chapter 7, The Ministry Of Magic Order The Phoenix, thanks guys. S: Holy shit dude. Wow that was- that was insane S: Holy crap. Panda: Oh yeah! Panda: Oooaahhh! K: Uh, I’m not sure if he was using drugs but, drugs are really bad for you just thought I should probably say S: No dude it wasn’t drugs there was a backi bong… K: Thank you for clapping. K: Yeah, but either way, drugs are really bad for you and they’re also illegal… …everywhere so you shouldn’t use them. S: No one did. S: Maybe. S: They’re not illegal everywhere. S: I can drink them in my house at least. K: You can I looked it up it’s not legal here. S: State to state you know, in America. K: No it’s not K: I’m in Europe and it’s illegal. S: Weed? K: Yeah but it’s not gonna be different the law is the law no matter where you’re from so you can’t do it man. S: This kid bro. S: Like, I went to Seattle… K: Alright now you’re just making places up. S: I mean weed is legal in like some states. S: This fucking little loser Kevin bitch there’s literally weed dispensaries in California… K: I already said stop making places up! S: Okay, your mother never fucking wanted you. K: That has nothing to do with this K: Alright I’m gonna Segway us out of this drug talk. K: Sleep is my drug, my bed is my dealer and my alarm clock is the police, thank you everyone. S: Fuck you and your Segway Kevin. S: I don’t think there’s a single person in this entire room that likes this fat ugly man Kevin.. K: I actually would like to intervene, I like myself so there is a single man who likes me. (Kevin laughing) K: Fallout: New Vegas is a failed… K: Spin-off, of Fallout 3 it is horrible who knows the original… …is the best game? S: Get off the stage. K: No, I have my freedom of speech and uno is better than Fallout: New Vegas, case closed. (Something in French) K: Hello, I only speak English so please speak English so I can get in on the fun. Thank you. K: Well that was a bit rude S: Wassup Kevin? How you doin’ Kevin? K: Holy shit it’s Logan Paul dude, you want to collab? Logan Paul: Buy that merch. Logan Paul: Buy that merch. K: That’s the wrong Paul I’m a big fan I know these things. K: Do you have any merchandise in “Old” size? Logan Paul: Old size? K: Yes I’m very old. S: That’s good K: Logan Paul get on up here I don’t know why I’m taking the stage for you I’m sorry. Logan Paul: Dead meme am I right guys? Logan Paul: Dead meme K: Yo, dude kill some rats or say something funny do- do a Logan Paul thing! Logan Paul: And go to my uh, website alright? K: Okay yeah, I mean conveyor. Logan Paul: And buy merch link in bio… K: Everyone has a hero… K: Zero people, shouldn’t have a hero K: Logan is my hero, he is really nice K: So I went and made a song about him twice… K: He is my hero, we share sometimes… K: For example this pizza slice… Logan Paul: Wait… How do you know all the words? Logan Paul: Are you reading that, I hope you’re reading that… K: I got to go… Shoutout to Patreons (Names)
(Flute in the background)

100 Comments

  • Alex Is a noob

    This comment section is horrible, there are no good comments, only people quoting the jokes, or pointing out obvious things.

  • SebassE3

    A extremely rich man, has a son. On the son's sixteenth birthday the father planned an extravaganza hiring rare and expensive wonders. Thousands of guest where to attend. To make his son's birthday perfect he asked his son what he wanted to make his birthday the best ever willing to buy the anything in the world. The son thought about this for along time and eventually told the father. "I want one Pink Ping Pong ball."
    The father was confused but he agreed. The day of the party was a event to remember the Blue Angels painted the sky and Indian mini elephants brought in a gilded chocolate cake. After the concert with too many high profile stars to name it was time to open the presents. Along with the slew of high end clothing and private islands there was a small box for the boys father. Inside was a Pink Ping Pong ball.
    The young man was ecstatic thanked his father profusely and scampered up to his room. He was in there about two hours before he came out and the Father never saw the Pink Ping Pong ball again.
    A year passed and the Father was ready to throw his son another birthday party. Again he wanted this to be the best party the world and his son had where seen. I mean 17 is an important age. So the father pulled out all the stop. And to make sure the party was perfect the father again asked his son about what he wanted as a present. And the son thought about it for a few minutes and said he wanted a whole crate of Pink Ping Pong balls. Now the father was confused and asked if the son if he was sure. The son thought for a couple more minutes and nodded. The day of the party the father had hired hundred's of A list celebrities to attend the party. He reconstructed the backyard of his mansion estate to accommodate a gilded marble statue of his son. The first truly sentient robot brought a cake made of edable diamonds. And every person in attendance got a gold plated iPhone 9 in their gift bags, complete with hologram features. Now it was time for the presents admist a real alein pet and a autographed copy of every president's portrait. Their was a large box from the boys father he opened it and inside was a large crate full of Pink Ping Pong balls. The son was ecstatic thank his father and rushed to his bedroom. The father never saw the crate or any of the Pink Ping Pong balls again.
    Another year passed and the father was trying to plan another party for his beloved son. Again he wanted the son to have everything and was prepared to spend billions to accommodate his sons any wish so he asked what the son wanted. Without even a pause the son said he wanted a whole truck full of Pink Ping Pong balls. The father had put up with a few years of wondering and had to ask what the son did with the Pink Ping Pong balls. The son looked at the father for a few seconds the responded. "Don't worry I will tell you in due time."
    Albeit very curious about the Pink Ping Pong balls the father respect his son and stopped asking. The day of the party the they where all transported to the surface of Mars and met the real Martians. The daughters of the king of Mars offered themselves to the son in sexual ways. I mean he is 18 now. After he had his way with them they filleted themselves and presented eachother to be eaten by the son. After the meal which tasted rather like a good smoked venison stake, they returned home it was time to open the presents. the frozen head of Walt Disney and a true recreation of Lola bunny for future sexual release set aside as the father showed the son the semi truck full of Pink Ping Pong balls. The son was ecstatic about this wonderful gift far more then another thing he had received. The boy when into the the back of the truck and closed the door. When he left out from the back of the truck five hours later the truck was completely empty not a Pink Ping Pong ball in site.
    Another year passes and the father knew he needed to out do himself. The father again asked the son what he wanted hesitant of the answer. Immediately the son responded with how he wanted a whole warehouse full of Pink Ping Pong balls. The father knew he had to find out what his son did with the Pink Ping Pong balls but still didn't want to invade his son's privacy. So he hatches a plan.
    The day of the party they enter a sub and went to the Lost City of the Mermaids. And met this queen of the city. The queen slept with the son then offered her daughter as food for the feast. The son saw the daughters beauty and rejected her offer to eat her and subsequently had sex with the princess. Still a hunger the son asked the queen if she wouldn't replace her daughter as the main course and the queen reluctantly agreed. A nice white fish mixed with a succulent stake, both the son and the Princess enjoyed the meal. And the son promised to keep in contact.
    The father brought them back to the surface. As it was time to open the gifts. After opening his platinum Suit of armor and a working lightsaber. The father led the son to a car that would drive the son to the Son to the warehouse. The driver was instructed by the father to ask about what the son was doing in the warehouse and with the Pink Ping Pong balls.
    As they drove the driver asked questions artfully. But alas the son skillfully doged the questions and the driver was left without an answer. They pulled up to the ware house and the son got out. He instructed the driver not to enter the warehouse and to return in the morning. Out from the window the driver saw that the warehouse was in fact full to the brim with Pink Ping Pong balls. In the morning the driver returned to see that the warehouse house was in fact empty. Later the father hired people to scoure the residence. But not a single Pink Ping Pong ball was to be found.
    Now the father was so curious that he had to find out be damned his sons privacy so he planed to set up cameras and do whatever it took to find out next year. But about a month before his birthday the son was in a terrible accident and was put on life support. The father stayed by his son every day and eventually the son did indeed wake up. The father distraught over his sons predicament told him that he would get the son anything anything he wanted. The son through his emense pain managed to ask "Father… dear Father can… You please… Get me… One Pink Ping Pong ball."
    The father blindsided by his sons request blurts out "damn it what do you do with those damn Pink Ping Pong balls?"
    The son repostions himself because of the pain before responding "I will tell you after you bring me the Pink Ping Pong ball"
    The father calls up the man that had gotten the other Pink Ping Pong balls and requested one more. If nothing else he would finally know about the Pink Ping Pong balls. The father contact brings the last Pink Ping Pong ball and the father sets it in front of the son. "Now tell me… What… What is it that you do with those Pink Ping Pong balls?"
    "Well… I…. Use the…. Pink… Ping… Pong…… Ballls…. For…….." and the son dies from his injuries.

  • Conductor Cultist

    When Kevin asked him him if he would come up and do some rap…

    I will admit it slightly convoluted terms that I heard him say that he was what he was assumed to be.

  • I love pizza 13938272

    4:31 I laughed so hard, you cut him off to go on the stage and say that and he looked at you like, “wtf.”

  • TheoristTDM

    At 3:36 I was taking a sip of tea and I’m not gonna lie, it poured out of my nose so much it could’ve put out the ring of fire.

  • BACA Supporter

    Dude… weed is legal in a lot of states. Seattle is a major American city in Washington with an inner city population of over 700,000, and a metro population of nearly 4 million. Weed is legal there, and I know for sure that it's also legal in California and Oregon. California is the most populated state in America with a state population of nearly 40 million. They have the 5th best economy in the entire world, and is home to L.A., The Bay Area, and San Diego, which I know for sure you've at least heard of L.A., the second most populated city in the U.S. Now for Oregon, they have 4 major American city's. I live in Portland, the most populated city in the state. The next 3 are: Eugene, Salem, and then Gresham. Combined, they have a population of nearly 4 million. Here, you can find weed shops EVERYWHERE, and I honestly believe weed shouldn't even be considered level with drugs. Weed actually has MANY health benefits from smoking it. It just kinda pisses me off because your talking about the US OF A, THE MOST POWERFUL COUNTRY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD. But I understand because it seems that you are part of the U.K.

  • Jurassic man

    Kevin in California and a few other states drugs are leagel, and in other states there is medical drugs that are leagle but in other states there not.

  • Madeline Harper

    The way Kevin got people to sing ring of fire MORE is making think there was never a Kevin but only ever a Jim Pickens

  • Siren

    Kevin : “Why do you have to search it? Do you not know it by memory?”
    Stranger: “…no, I”
    STAGE LIGHTS
    Kevin: “BEES SHOULD NOT BE ABLE TO FLY”
    Lmaoooo

  • my dog is bella

    It's because they're delicious 3-grain flakes combined whole wheat barley and rice to deliver a crunchy and nourishing breakfast enriched with a blend of 9 essential vitamins and minerals including; vitamin D, vitamin B, vitamin C, zinc and iron. Special K has many of the nutrients you need to help you feel strong. Ingredients in Special K include: wheat bran, soy grits, rice, wheat gluten, soybean oil, soy protein isolate, whole grain wheat, contains 2% or less of sugar, salt, malt flavouring, sucralose, natural and artificial flavour, and BHT for freshness. Vitamins and minerals include vitamin C (ascorbic acid), vitamin E (alpha tocopherol acetate), niacinamide, reduced iron, vitamin B6 (pyridoxine hydrochloride), vitamin B1 (thiamin hydrochloride), vitamin A (palmitate), vitamin B2 (riboflavin), folic acid, and vitamin B12

  • Your Friendly Neighborhood Pansexual

    Just wanna point out that the line about man lying with man was actually a poorly translated line about pedophilia

  • Thiefman 6719

    Why do people eat special K

    Well it's because their delicious 3-grain flakes combine whole-wheat, barley and rice to deliver a crunchy and nourishing breakfast. Enriched with a blend of 9 essential vitamins and minerals such as vitamin D, B vitamins, zinc and iron, Special K has many of the nutrients you need to help you feel strong from the inside.

  • Alex Giovanni

    “I can tell trolls from serious people, I’ve been doing this for a while” YET HE LETS KEVIN STAY. THIS MAN HAS NO IDEA WHAT HES MESSING WITH

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